Thursday, July 29, 2010
Make a wish
Well today I get a phone call in the store from a man named Steve, from "make a wish" he says, "Do you know what we do?" I start crying . . . because apparently that's what I do this week . . . cry . . .
Steve goes on to tell me they are having a "wine and Wishes" event, and was wondering if I could donate some flowers.
Ok so how do I say no to Make a wish??? Is that even possible, considering the history. . . and that Thomas got a wish.
I talk to him and find out what he wants, it really isn't that much . . . and I price it out . . . not that much either . . . I call and tell him I will do it.
He and the lady in charge come in and we finalize it . . . and its all good . . . but I cried all through the meeting, they asked me about Thomas, and I cried through that too. The lady says that Thomas' name sounds familiar. I wonder if she helped him get his wish.
Since I am doing the flowers, they invited me to come to the event as their guest . . . I hope I can go to it with out crying.
So I wonder, do you think Thomas sent them to me . . . Do you think that some Divine providence helped them to come to be because they knew I would be receptive to this??
Isn't it strange???
It makes me happy that she wants to have a relationship with me . . . but does it strike you as odd???
Wednesday, July 28, 2010
What does "Family" mean to you?
I grew up as pretty much an only child . . . I am my moms only child . . . my DAD Has 4 other children, all older than me . . . And my bio father has one other daughter, who is younger than me. Does that make sense? Hope so.
My older siblings always thought of me as a nuisance . . . and never really wanted to have anything to do with me . . . I thought they were so cool and wonderful when I was little . . . But then as an adult, I know just how badly they are fucked up.
When I was 13 or was it 11 . . . what ever . . . in that time frame at least, I got a call from my bio father that I was a big sister . . . Tiffini was born! I was so excited . . . I couldn't wait to someday have a relationship with her . . . to be the big sister I never got to have with my older siblings. I wanted so much to go and do the sister shopping thing, and call each other and talk for long hours about special sister things . . . I wanted that fantasy . . . but like with all fantasies . . . reality pales by comparison.
My younger sister and I don't get along . . . we don't see eye to eye on . . . pretty much anything. . . Every conversation I have ever had with her she tells me how "Brilliant" she is . . . and then spends the rest of the conversation saying "Some day I want to send out cards like you do." Well . . . in my world, if you want to send cards to people . . . you buy a card, get a stamp and a pen and write out the card and address it . . . and then put it in the mail . . . it doesn't take much more effort than that . . . It's really a simple thing . . . But if she is so brilliant. . . why can't she figure out how to do it? I think it's just one of those things that people say . . . like "oh your baby is so cute." when in their head they are thinking, "Did you have sex with an anteater? That is the ugliest baby I have ever seen!" Or she would tell me stories of our Bio father. . . and when I say I wish I knew him of that I don't have any stories of my own, or that I wish I had known him . . . I get yelled at by her, for not appreciating her ""Good Dad stories", and always turning them in to Bad dad stories" (Well, the man left and never paid child support, threatened to kidnap me when I was little, would call every couple years and make promises he would never follow through with and didn't come in to my life till I was 28 years old and to grown to care, still continued to make promises he wouldn't follow through with, and then one time he even told me I had a big butt.) Doesn't seem like very good stuff to me . . . even her stories are not that great . . . she stole a candy bar from a store once and hid it in her sock . . . he said to her, "I don't care if you are going to be a thief, but at least be a good one." WHAT?!?!!?!? What a goober!!!
My sister said to me once, after we had a tiff and I deleted her from my face book . . . "You said family was so important to you . . . and then you just delete us." (I actually deleted her, her husband and her daughter- the daughter I felt bad about, because she was simply guilty by association) The more I thought about it and what she said, "Family was so important to you." I figured out . . . that family relationships are like any other kind of relationship . . . it takes two to make it work . . . one person can't do it all by them selves. I was the only one really working on the relationship with my sister . . . and she pretty much just let me . . . I'm not blaming her for it, if I had someone who would do all the work in our relationship, I think I would let them. No, that's wrong, I'm not that kind of person . . . I think I would end up hating myself and them if I did that.
So I deleted my sister from my life . . . Humm . . . goodness it looks so bad to type that . . . I deleted my sister from my life . . . but you know what . . . I don't regret doing it . . . My life is simpler for it . . . and I don't stress and worry about it any more . . . I just know that we don't get a long and have chosen to live separate lives . . .
I realized that "blood makes a biological family" . . . true . . . but there are people who you are related to by blood that don't fit in to your life . . . who you just really don't like- who if you weren't related to by blood you would NEVER have anything to do with. That's how I feel about my sister . . .
I have taken a lot of people who are NOT related to me by blood and brought them into my life and home . . . and loved them as though they were related by blood . . .
Humm . . . I don't know . . . I think it comes down to "like finding like . . ." we find people who are like us . . . people who draw out the best in you . . . to come in to your life and build you up . . . the people who tear you down, are not the important people to have with you . . .
I think about how my older siblings have never really been a part of my life, and now that I have quit my younger sister, I'm an only child again . . . Well . . . no . . . not really . . . I have "SISTERS" who have been more "Sisterly"to me through my life than my sisters have . . . I will never be an only child again . . . as I have the most wonderful sisters in the world! (you know who you are!!!)
Tuesday, July 27, 2010
I made this last night
4 chicken thighs
2 chicken breasts with skin and backbone, halved crosswise (I used a rotisserie chicken)
2 teaspoons salt, plus more to taste
1 teaspoon freshly ground black pepper, plus more to taste
1/2 cup all purpose flour, for dredging
3 tablespoons olive oil
1 large red bell pepper, chopped
1 onion, chopped
3 garlic cloves, finely chopped
3/4 cup dry white wine
1 ( 28-ounce) can diced tomatoes with juice
3/4 cup reduced-sodium chicken broth
3 tablespoons drained capers
1 1/2 teaspoons dried oregano leaves
1/4 cup coarsely chopped fresh basil leaves
Directions
Sprinkle the chicken pieces with 1 teaspoon of each salt and pepper. Dredge the chicken pieces in the flour to coat lightly. (I'm not sure I liked that the chicken had flour on it . . . I think it made the actual dish a little to gummy . . .)
In a large heavy saute pan, heat the oil over a medium-high flame. Add the chicken pieces to the pan and saute just until brown, about 5 minutes per side. If all the chicken does not fit in the pan, saute it in 2 batches. Transfer the chicken to a plate and set aside. Add the bell pepper, onion and garlic to the same pan and saute over medium heat until the onion is tender, about 5 minutes. Season with salt and pepper. Add the wine and simmer until reduced by half, about 3 minutes. Add the tomatoes with their juice, broth, capers and oregano. Return the chicken pieces to the pan and turn them to coat in the sauce. Bring the sauce to a simmer. Continue simmering over medium-low heat until the chicken is just cooked through, about 30 minutes for the breast pieces, and 20 minutes for the thighs.
Today is my
Even though I'm not talking to her, and have no plan of talking to her . . . potentially ever again . . . I do think of her on her birthday and hope that she is doing well . . . and that life becomes what she wants it to be.
Monday, July 26, 2010
I had a bad day
Tuesday, July 20, 2010
Our New Mexico trip
And Jessie~
They did so good on the trip! And had so much fun at the camp ground running around and meeting new people!
It was a great trip!
I like "camping" now . . . just don't ask me to do the tent thing . . . NEVER GONNA HAPPEN!!!
Friday, July 16, 2010
My head is so full . . . .
So, let me back track a bit . . .
Tim wants to go get the trailer down in new Mexico . . . should be fun . . . but he picks this weekend to do it.
Well . . .
~this weekend is Tony's 20th birthday! and I know he probably isn't going to spend time with me, but if he wants to I want to be around for that.
~I have had 4 wedding consultations
~ Maggianos down town Denver is trying to give me a nervous breakdown
With so much wedding/party stuff and then Maggianos wanting me to do more for them, I feel totally overwhelmed! I worry that there is not enough of ME to go around.
When I come home it takes everything in me not to fall asleep on the sofa . . . I'm tired. I'm exhausted. I cook dinner and that's about all the energy I have . . . (What I don't understand is why I have to cook dinner every night, and then put it all away and clean the kitchen . . . Why is that my job . . . I am one of 3 people living here. . . And I work hard too. I think if I cook then someone else should put the stuff away and someone else should clean the kitchen but it all falls on me. But I digress . . . back to the topic at hand.)
But we are going to go pick up the trailer this weekend . . . and Tim is upset at me because I'm not more excited . . .
Have you seen me lately . . . I'm not excited for anything- I'm tired! I need help in the store . . . Mom keeps telling me, "I'm helping you." but she isn't doing all the things that I need or even want to have done . . . I'm tired.
I went and picked up a book on CD for the "going to new Mexico" trip . . . and Tim said "That's the first thing you've done that even makes me think you are even remotely excited." Excited . . . I think it's in there somewhere . . . but my primary emotions are tired and overwhelmed . . . I need a break! He keeps saying to me, "You need a break, that's why we are going." But then he is putting pressure on me to "Be excited."
Why do I have to be excited now??? I still have so much to do!!! I have to go to work and do a party, and the orders and get the rest of the store cleaned up . . . and then I have to go with Alex to his college because they "Randomly picked us to be . . . fucked up the ass" Hummm . . . maybe that wasn't it . . . I don't know . . . So when Alex and I go later today, I will bring my last years taxes and some lube~ just in case.
Then yesterday, When I talked to Tim, I told him I wanted to work a half day on Saturday . . . and he said that was fine, and then now he is mad at me for working an half day on Saturday (Because it will put us in New Mexico too late) . . . so now I have to talk to mom again and ask her if I can have Saturday and Monday off. I'm tired. I'm overwhelmed with stuff for the store . . . and I don't have any relief from that . . .
Driving to New Mexico to pick up the trailer and then driving back is probably not going to make me relaxed~ Have I motioned I have car anxiety??? Did we all forget that I HATE TO BE IN THE CAR . . . Don't get me wrong, I do want to go, I do want to spend some time with Tim, I do want to get the hell out of dodge . . . but . . . I didn't want there to be so much pressure on me to do this and "be excited" and "relax" and "have a good time" . . .
I love my blog. . . it's a good place to vent . . .
Thursday, July 15, 2010
An old friend
Tracy Fassman/Blinder~ What a sweetie!!
We talked and ate and had so much fun!!! We will have to do it again soon!!!
It was wonderful getting reacquainted!!! I hope we get to get together again soon!
Wednesday, July 14, 2010
I made~ Chicken Artichoke squares for dinner last night.
2 chicken breasts cut in strips (I used a rotisserie chicken as I was going to at least double the recipe~ and it was so good, and smokey flavored)
Pkg of frozen spinach
1 can of drained artichoke hearts (I bought a huge jar and then peeled off the leafy parts, they are too tough and crusty for something like this)
8 oz sour cream
Parmesan cheese (I did fresh, I don't like the dry crusty stuff!)
Garlic salt (to taste) (YUMMM!!! Lots of garlic salt!!)
1 can of crescent rolls
(Oh and I added a pack of cream cheese to mine- as if it wasn't fattening enough~ add it when you add the sour cream)
Heat olive oil in a skillet and cook chicken strips 5-7 minutes on each side or until done. (Since I used the rotisserie chicken I just plucked off the meat and put it in the pan, no need to "cook it" just warm it.)
Add in frozen spinach (Make sure you drain all the extra juice out of it, I just squeezed it out with my hands) and artichokes and cook together 7-10 minutes.
Add in sour cream, Parmesan cheese (as much or little as you want), and garlic salt.
Heat oven to 350 degrees and open up crescent rolls. Put a small amount of mixture on each roll and fold up (I rolled mine, thinking I could put more stuff in them.). Sprinkle with Parmesan cheese and cook 10-12 minutes. (It took mine about 25 minutes too cook . . . be sure to cook them till they are golden brown- you don't want to eat them raw!)
The meat mixture was sooooo yummy! I was eating it with a spoon.
I have been trying a lot of new recipes lately, and the guys have been happy with most . . . Alex doesn't like mushrooms so if I make something with those, he complains . . . but last night he said to me, "Mom, this is the best new thing you have made!!" That made me really happy!!!
So give it a try! I think you will like it! It was super yummy . . . I made a huge batch, and still have 10 left over in my fridge . . . If they don't have them eaten up by tonight, I will freeze them.
I love my seal a meal!!!
I think you will really like this recipe!!! I have been challenging myself to try to make at least one new thing a week . . . Some have been hits, others have been misses . . . but variety is the spice of life!!
Monday, July 12, 2010
:(
My sweet baby . . . broken leg, makes me just want to cry!
From what Destiny tells me is that Ken was on the bed and Destiny was putting some laundry away (very close to the bed) and Ken just fell off.
I have not seen her yet, but apparently this cast is on for a week, and then they will put her in another one next week . . . my poor sweet baby . . . it makes this granny's heart just sick.
Friday, July 9, 2010
Don't touch the coconuts!!
This my dad and his friend Ed, with all the dancing girls . . .
So cool! I'm happy to have the pictures. I'm going to get them put in to the album! And then I truly will be done with their trips!
Wednesday, July 7, 2010
Update~ Scarlett
Or I guess I should say Tim found her. He looked on Craig's list and someone had posted they found a dog, he called them and it was her!!!
So we have her back!! I'm sure Beth will be so happy!!!
We are being ornery . . . and are NOT telling Beth's sister we have the dog . . . we are thinking that she should have to deal with having lost the dog longer. (I know we shouldn't be the judge and jury, but right now, I just can't even imagine letting her take care of the dogs again!)
Tuesday, July 6, 2010
No Respect!!!
And I assume that we would all like others to hold themselves to the same level we hold ourselves to. But they don't. And that makes it hard sometimes.
I don't want to be hatin' on someone I don't know, but I'm I'm finding it super hard not to judge!!!
I told you we were going to watch Beth's dogs while she was out of town, right? Well 2 days into it, Beth called Tim and told him that her sister had a big fight with her husband and was going to be going to her house to stay, and she would be taking care of the dogs.
I was like YIPPEE!!!!! Having 2 more dogs in the house was not easy . . . especially since they are not trained like our dogs are. (I guess it's the same thing with dogs as it is with kids. . . you always like the way yours act better than other peoples and it's easier to tolerate how they act.)
I was happy for the extra dogs that they would get to be in their home for the holiday . . . it would be so much easier on them to be in their own house durring the fireworks.
Well . . . Beth's sister is a dingbat!!! I don't know her but I don't like her at all!!!!
This stupid woman left the dogs outside, and even during the day, people were setting off fire works . . . and Scarlett got so scared that she busted through the fence. Beth's sister didn't even call Beth to tell her. Tim went over to check on the dogs (even though he technically wasn't supposed to any more~ The sister was supposed to be taking care of them) and Scarlett was gone. He is just sick over it. He has been out looking for her all the time. The pound was closed yesterday . . . so today he will be calling all the pounds and seeing if they have her today.
So this story gets even stupider. Tim goes by Beth's to check on Bobby, (her sister is still staying at the house- but after her loosing Scarlett, we are worried to let her keep the dogs.) and Bobby is out side in the kennel, there are more fireworks going off and Bobby is going crazy! So Tim brought him home. About 10 at night Beth's sister calls and says, "do you know where bobby is??" Why would she leave him outside when she knows that the fireworks scare him? She already lost one of her sister's dogs . . . and she is acting like it's no big deal.
I am so upset for Scarlett! I feel so bad . . . poor girl was just scared! And now she is out there alone and scared . . . Beth's sister needs her ass handed to her. She apparently has no respect for Beth or the things she holds dear in her life.
Dogs are people too!
Monday, July 5, 2010
Scrapbooking July
And I'm sure making a dent in the amount of pictures from the past that still need to be scrapped. Which is very exciting to me . . . someday when I'm done with all the stuff that still needs to be scrapped then I am planning on working on heritage albums for all the sides of the family and some mini albums . . . So I think I will always scrapbook . . . it just won't be this mad dash to get things done anymore. But who knows maybe I'll have more grand kids and will be compelled to scrapbook all of them too.
So here are some of the ones I've already done this month.
This is me and former hubby #1 at his Christmas party one year. The photographer liked me, or my dress and took a bunch of pictures of us. . . . there were more pictures of us than any other couple.
My cutie patootie boys!!!
A photo of my dad in a helicopter.
My dad in Washington in the army.
Me, just chilling out and reading a book on the patio.
Good golly was I big pregnant!!! UGH! And Former hubby #1 was touching me . . . (ICK!!)
Alex getting a pedi! He doesn't know I took the picture with my phone!!
This is me and Avery . . . I was nursing him and then fell asleep.
Peek a boo!~ (Alex)