It hits me hard sometimes . . . ..

there are days when all of a sudden I realize I will never see Thomas again. It's a horrible thought. It is like someone driving stakes through my heart. Ever time a battery dies in my house I think it's Thomas trying to manifest himself as a ghost (I think I've watched too many episodes of Ghost hunter)

When I'm at work and I hear the song "I can only imagine" by Mercy Me, I feel like a wreck . . . I ache, and I hurt, and I hope, that Thomas it there in the beauty of Heaven. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0xwzItqYmII Here is a link to the song, I don't know how to actually post the video. Every time I hear this song I imagine Thomas in heaven dancing and singing . . . looking out for me, telling me not to be sad, not to miss him, that he is well and happy . . . and that we will be together soon, (Soon for him is the blink of an eye, for me it is years and years)

I SO want him to be happy . . .and well . . . and standing there waiting . . . waiting to greet all of us as we come . . . I know that "heaven" is a better place for having him there. But damn, I still want him here with me. Is that selfish? I don't know.

When I've had older people pass away, there is grief, and sadness . . . but to have Thomas die has hurt me beyond anything I can think of . . . I had so many things I still wanted to say to him, so many things I still wanted to do.

But now I guess "I can only imagine . . . "

I'm not an expert!

I realize we all struggle with certain things. For me, it's letting my heart distract me . . . I can fill my life with all kinds of people and things, and then loose my self in the processes.

I can become distracted with too many things . . . and not take the moment, or moments I NEED to make peace with my self.

Scrapbooking is my way of being creative (outside of work- because creativity at work, is still work) and letting my brain stop . . . I can tune out all the outside world when I step in to my "Girl cave" my safe haven of pinkness! And just decompress!

In my effort to simplify . . . I have been organizing. And de cluttering!

I struggled at Valentines to get my cards made for the store. And what I realized is that I had things organized badly. (If you know me, or have known me longer than a minute you know that my brain takes it's own course and I can flitter from one thing to another quickly and without notice.)

So here is what is currently working for me in my office.

This shelf sits right to my left side, it has my 8x8 papers in it, and my 8x11, and my "Baggies" (I love baggies!!) and all my glue and risers and things for my cricut. It is close so I don't have to get up to get anything! I can just sit and reach for what I want.

This is where I keep the packs of foam risers (I use lots of them.), my sanding blocks, my hole punch and other things I don't need to have out. Lower on the shelf is my boxes of brads and things like that, Along with a couple of card catalogues that I want to "steal" some sentiments out of for my cards.

This again, is that same shelf, just on the other side of it . . . also totally within reach my cricut cartridges, (Except for the holiday ones which are in with the holiday stuff they are associated with)

I think in organizing the most important thing is to do what works for you! Just because this works for me, doesn't mean it will work for you . . . For me, this seems to be working (for now), but it may not work for you. So do what feels right and good in your world.

This is how I'm organizing some of the things I like to use on my pages.

They are all in the shoe box tubs and then with in the tub is jars filled with scrapbooking goodness!

I was trying to get the top of each jar labeled but Alex decided to "help"me use my labeler, and now it's broke. Oh well . . . something to do on another day.

Ok so sitting on the right hand side of where I sit when I scrap is my stacks of papers. All sorted by color! I love to sort by color, that works for me, but my BFF lorinda sorts by pattern . . . So what every you think will work for you . . . do it! It's your space!!! Have fun with it!

Also I sort my "other accessories" by color, so if I want some blue "something or other" all I have to do is open my Blue drawer and there it is.

(UGH! Dog toys and picture frames are not supposed to be in there . . . but oh well . . . still seeking places for the frames, and having 5 dogs is a lot like having a house full of toddlers there are always toys every where.)

These are the scrapbooks that are done, well kind of . . . I don't scrap in order so there is a lot of pages that need to be moved around and changed and I have to get a lot more books because I have over filled them and the spines are looking ugly.

The other thing I do is everyone is color coordinated. Alex has black books, Tony Red, Avery will have Blue books (I don't assemble the books till graduations from high school~ so they are out for the party) and Avery still has another year of school. Tim and my book is yellow, and My Books are pink. My dads are brown cowboy looking, my moms red floral, and my aunties FLORAL (She loves flowers) and then Thomas book is red, and Jessie's book is blue and green . . . I just kind of see what appeals to me when I'm looking for something specific. (Tuesday morning, store has great prices on books.)

Still more clutter that needs to be dealt with. Isn't this picture of Tony when he was 1 cute??? It will go up high on my shelf (When ever Tim gets it up there) so it's on display.

As I've said, I don't scrap in order, so I have all of these plastic folders to hold the layouts I've done. When I scrapbook I want to scrap whatever appeals to me at any given moment. If I had to scrap in order and I was stuck scrapping pages with Former hubby #2 because that was the year I was stuck in I would have to grab a hand full of "Happy pill" and a bottle of Cognac, and see if I could put his "crack smoking dumpy butt" on paper~ I wouldn't probably get much done If I HAD to do it that way.

Ok so now~ This is how I'm organizing my holiday stuff.

I'm keeping all the papers and stickers and ribbon and other stuff attached to that specific holiday in one place . . . Now lets say I'm doing a layout of Tim and I and we are kissing (Which happens a lot) then I can grab my Valentine box and it has all my stuff, stuff , and stuff in it . . . it's all right there.

And that's the same way I have the stuff . . . and Winter stuff.

There are other things I want to tell you about how I'm organizing my office space and decluttering, but I think I've probably told you more than enough for today . . .

The thing I'm happiest about with my new organization of my office is that I find I'm using a lot more of my products, because I can see them, and I'm not having to dig through a bunch of stuff to find what I want.

So if you are on a quest to organize . . . do one thing today . . . maybe find all your ribbon and put it in a box . . . or find all your heart stuff and put it in a box . . . It's up to you to do what works for you . . .

Don't look at a whole room and get overwhelmed, look at one little thing, and if you get that one thing done, and you are feeling motivated find one more little thing to organize . . . soon you will have so much done, and you were never even stressed out about doing it. I think a lot of time, we have to play with our heads a bit so we get the things done that seem like a mountain. Remember ~ "even one rain drop raises the ocean".

You just have to

34 Scrapbooking pages so far in Feb!

As I've said before I'm working really hard at staying true to my goals. My scrapbooking goal is 2o pages a month. This month SBA has a challenge to do 28 pages in 28 days, I didn't think I would participate in it, but I have surpassed my goal and the also the 28 pages I could do for the challenge.

So here they are~

Me and Tony~ I did 2 of these.

I also did 2 of these. Tony is always messing with me . . . it's fun for him to torment who ever is close to him at any given moment.

I also did 2 of these. Tony and Jessie were having so much fun, talking and being silly! I love it when the kids are silly!

I love this picture of Tim!! He is so cute! He hardly ever drinks, but this night (our Christmas eve) he was drinking . . . It's funny to watch him!

I don't know exactly how this picture crossed my path while I was scrapbooking this past Christmas, but since I had it in my hand, and was feeling motivated, I scrapped it.

this is Alex when he was about 6. He wasn't feeling well. But I think that's pretty obvious from the picture.

After we ate dinner we sat around and played some games. It's always one of my favorite parts of the holidays!

I scrapped 3 of these. It's simple, but I didn't want to take away from what it really was, Alex, tony and Jessie just having a moment! I love that!

This picture is kind of fuzzy . . . sorry about that, but I'm also not in the mood to fix it . . . So here are some of the people who came to dinner. Love to have people over.
I love my cricut! I was able to cut this little snowman out with it, and then I did this pages of Jessie being HOME for the holiday!!! I love it when she comes home!

Alex and Jessie, I made 2 of these. I love it when they just hang out!

I love this picture of Alex! He is so handsome and grown. I love the man he has become! I made 2 of these.

Usually I'm the one behind the camera, so there aren't many picture of me. I get excited when there is a picture of me. I love Alex in the background, he was helping Kindrick play (what ever game we were playing at the time)

this is my dad! I just love simple pictures of everyone . . . not a lot of fuss, but the love that goes in to putting one picture of some one you love and care about to paper, and just enjoying the person on the paper.

This is my Aunties page . . . she is hard to get pictures of. So it's kind of one of those take what you get, kind of things.

My dads page

My moms page
And this is my favorite layout of the entire group! I made 3 of these. Alex and Jessie playing Beer Pong with Tony and Aunt Jaqui!

Cheers! A toast to the new year!!!

I really like this layout with Tim, and the little snow man . . . So cute! Again, I made the snowman with my Cricut! It's a wonderful machine, I can do so much with it! And it takes my scrapbooking to another level.

Well that's it . . . 34 pages! I love that I was able to meet my goal and surpass it. I love it that I will be able to be in the SBA 28/28 challenge . . . and I love it that I think I got all my Christmas pictures with Jessie scrapped!! Yippee!

So what that means to me, is that she needs to come out again so I have more pictures to scrap of her!!! Miss you my sweet Jessie!